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contemplating my demise

Have I mentioned I downloaded a client and am enjoying not having to code by hand all my lj posts? Yes, it has fueled the tendency to actually write something in here, rather than simply think about it. I feel utterly spoiled.

And lazy. I wish I could download a client to write a story I've promised. EEEKKK.

Last year, I was invited to write for an invitation-only K/S zine celebrating 40 years of Star Trek. Yes indeed! How in the world could I turn down that invite, and from my absolutely favorite zine editors? And then inspiration hit, and I scrolled through my works-in-progress folder and found a really pretty damn good, long story I'd started years back, maybe about, oh, I'd say, 1/3 completed.

So great! Here's a piece already loosely outlined, the first third written, and all I need to do is finish.

Yup. All I need to do is finish. Finish. As in...write more. A lot more.

Did I mention the deadline is this August? Uh-huh.

Did I mention I haven't written a thing on it yet? Um.

Did I mention I'm just starting to worry? I'm not exactly the most prolific writer in the world. (In other words, it craps out like I've got constipation.)

And I've only got two months left to do it in. Months in which my father is going to have major surgery (after just having the heart surgery a month ago.) Months in which my daughter--sweet and blessed as she is, but she's still needy---will be home, every day, because school is out. Months in which the Spouse is traveling all over the place--currently in Alaska, next week in New Jersey--and so I will have no home support or help with the resident father or the offspring.

If I wasn't nuts before now, I'm sure I will be very soon.

Comments

( 8 spoke — Speak )
shearebliss
Jun. 8th, 2006 02:12 pm (UTC)
:nostalgically; I used to think voice activated software would be really cool for that magically writing a story until I realized how much work you have to do to TRAIN the software to recognize your particular accents. Then I thought about something that could magically read it from my brain, and that was less work, but pretty scary.
sundara
Jun. 8th, 2006 04:10 pm (UTC)
Ha! Yes, I've had those thoughts many times myself. Actually, I've not really had a scary reaction...I'm just enthralled with the idea of plugging in and being One with the hard drive. What risks, I say? Think of it...no more impatience, waiting on slowness...oh the instantaneousness of it all. (Let's not think of the no more brain scenario)
gryphonrhi
Jun. 8th, 2006 04:06 pm (UTC)
Eeeep! Good luck!
sundara
Jun. 8th, 2006 04:11 pm (UTC)
Words falls out of you like water. Send me some of your writing-diarrhea mojo when you get a moment! I need the help.
gryphonrhi
Jun. 8th, 2006 06:50 pm (UTC)
You already make me sound contagious, dear! ::wincing a little:: In all sorts of ways. But yeah, once I know where something's going or what needs to be written next, it just goes. Um. ::considers:: Half a minute. I'll go find something I told lomedet about writing..... Which I can't find. Drat. Okay, try this.

Sit down in front of the computer. Close your eyes. Think about the story and picture it as water welling up into you and ready to fountain out your fingers onto the screen. Then open your eyes and write. If it needs editing, that's afterwards. You're a fountain, you get to leave spray and droplets everywhere. You'll do that later.

{{hugs}} and good luck!

sundara
Jun. 8th, 2006 09:01 pm (UTC)
Oh, I love this visualization. Thanks. Sometimes it's the littlest things that can make a big difference.
jimpage363
Jun. 8th, 2006 04:37 pm (UTC)
When you put it like that, dear...ouch. I didn't realize your Dad had had heart surgery - yipe!
Maybe your big hobby activity over the summer should be something uncomplicated, like breathing.
love!
sundara
Jun. 8th, 2006 09:09 pm (UTC)
Yeah, they wanted to do a by-pass on him, but he said no, not at 84. Which I can't blame him for, really. So, the surgeon and I pow-wow'd while he was on the table (from angiogram) and surgeon decided to try a stent. But he was really concerned that he wouldn't be able to get the stent *in*, and/or that trying would cause a mess, like...*heart failure* or knocking plaque off and jamming up artery. He was pretty concerned. However, it turned out well, the stent went in and he came home a day later (geez, I stayed in longer after both kids). Got to have a nice stay in the brand-new, 2 months old Sentara Heart Hospital in Norfolk.

Now he's got to go back in and have a pretty nasty hernia fixed. He's really turning into the 6 Million Dollar Man with all the replacement parts.

Breathing, especially if it were on the beach with lots of sand, sun and waves, and tall frosted drink glasses sounds really, really *nice*. "Oh, cabana boy...."
( 8 spoke — Speak )